And the fun just contiues...

When the mail came on Friday I was beyond ecstatic when I saw an envelope from the USCIS in Cleveland. If you remember we had to re-apply for our I171H which expires on December 18th. If you don't have your consulate appointment in Guangzhou by that date, well...you can just go home without your baby!

We had been told by the agency to fill out another I600A and send it to USCIS with a check, MINUS the money for fingerprints since we had them redone in August. We did what our agency told us to do and in less than a week we received a BIG manila envelope from USCIS with all of our documents returned to us saying that we owed them money for fingerprints. We never even THOUGHT of calling the agency to ask them what to do. We just assumed it was a government agency not realizing that this was a renewal and whoever was looking at our paperwork didn't want to look up our case number. SO! We made a copy of our amended I171H which states very clearly that our fingerprints are good until November of 2007 and sent everything back to USCIS.

Shortly after we mailed it off for the second time, all heck broke loose on the boards AND at our agency. It seems a lot of people were getting their paperwork back from the Cleveland USCIS and were having to pay and be fingerprinted FOR A THIRD TIME. The agency was no help whatsoever. They basically told us to expect to get our papers kicked back to us yet again and expect to pay the fingerprinting fee AND be refingerprinted for the third time. They advised their other clients to pay the fee and be refingerprinted a third time...without contacting the USCIS and asking them what was going on. Well guess what? All the USCIS needs is A COPY OF YOUR AMENDED I171H to prove to them that your fingerprints are current. It is SO wonderful to do something that your gut tells you is right even when your agency tells you something different.

SO! Back to last Friday. There sat that little...notice I said LITTLE...not big old manila envelope...but a little envelope from the USCIS in Cleveland. I tore into that sucker like a kid on Christmas morning. I mean, we got our referral the day before and now here was our brand new I171H which gives us permission to adopt her and bring her home!

WRONG!!!!!

They can't process our request because...are you ready? THEY DON'T HAVE OUR HOME STUDY. Ok...we were told on November 7th by OUR agency that it had been sent. This means either THE AGENCY is lying, it was lost by the postal service, it was lost by the USCIS, or it fell through the wardrobe and is living happily somewhere in Narnia.

Garry called the agency on Friday and was told that the person he needed to speak to was away from her desk. He left a message on her voicemail...which by the way stated that she is there until 5:30 on Friday's. She didn't return his call. He called back at 5:00 and was told she had left for the day. I am ready to go up there and start SHAKING people! GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER!!! YOU ARE SCREWING WITH PEOPLE'S LIVES!!!!

Ok, I'm going to go back to gazing at my beautiful Claire's face. It is impossible to be upset AND look at that silly little smile.

Until next time...

And the joy just continues...

Well, after my cry this morning I called Garry and told him the news. He was as thrilled as I was obviously. I then shoved a Twix bar into my mouth and turned on Joyce Meyer. As usual, God was using her to speak directly to my situation. I was reminded that in life there are going to be times of joy AND times of sorrow, but God always has my back. It is MY job to stop acting like a whiny brat and go on with my life and trust HIM to do what is right. I did some seriously loud sobbing, and then my day really turned around...for awhile. I even vowed to write a best seller titled, "God & Chocolate".

The phone rang this morning and it was our social worker. Remember I said we had to redo our I600A? Garry sent all of that in to USCIS in Cleveland and they promptly sent it all back because we hadn't included the fee for fingerprints. Garry found the amendment to our current I171H that clearly states that our fingerprints are good until November 2007, copied it, and sent everything back to them. So far so good. They also need an update from our social worker, which brings me to her call this morning. Apparently someone from the agency called her today and wanted to know where the update was. She knew nothing about it. Apparently they sent her an email and she never got it. I don't know...is it just me or isn't that something important enough to pick up the phone for in the first place? Whatever, it's taken care of now.

Garry then called Chris at the agency to see what's up with our LID. Here's where the fun really begins. The agency did receive referrals today...not for our group though...for the group AFTER us. Yes, our dossiers were sent to China on August 9th, 2005 and logged in on August 25th, 2005. Their's went over later in August and were logged in on September 5th, 2005. Apparently the mix-up was complete in that ours are now September 5th, and theirs are August 25th.

He also questioned her about USCIS returning our packet and refingerprinting. Get this...every USCIS office does it differently...EVEN WITHIN THE SAME STATE. Depending on what Cleveland does, we may have to PAY THEM AGAIN and HAVE OUR FINGERPRINTS TAKEN YET AGAIN EVEN THOUGH WE JUST WENT THROUGH THIS IN AUGUST!!!!!

Fury best describes how I'm feeling...so does depressed...sad and angry work too...and I've even managed to whip out a dark laugh. I'm tired...soooo very tired. I don't want to feel like this. My spirit knows that God is behind this and He knows best. My flesh just wants to yell, scream, and make somebody else hurt like I do right now.

Why is this happening? I don't get it...I really don't get it. I just want to see my baby's face...please God...soon?

More disjointed ramblings from a waiting parent...

I am beyond insane...simply beyond it...and not in a GOOD way! On a happy, well, maybe not...maybe INTERESTING note, the last referral cutoff was August 9th, 2005. That was the date that our dossier was sent to China.

I have come to rely on the rumors now. Whereas before I found them irritating, now as we get closer and closer I find them NECESSARY to get through the day. The latest are certainly interesting. Supposedly referrals are coming out next week and the cutoff will be August 23-24, 2005. Remember our first LID? AUGUST 25, 2005. There is also a new one saying that all of us with messed up LID's will be taken in the order that our files were RECEIVED and not logged in. Hey, it's a long shot but at least it's positive. Either way I'd like to think that if we aren't included in this batch that they could include BOTH of our LID's in next month's group.

We are more than ready to be finished, done, completed, through etc. with THE AGENCY. I don't want to go into a long diatribe about this agency...there are many, MANY satisfied current and former clients... but after almost two years in the program this time, we've just seen, heard, and witnessed too many things that shouldn't be going on. First and foremost is the "cloak and dagger" attitude. Client "A" calls agency Contact "1", asks a question, gets a response. Client "B" calls agency Contact "2", asks the same question, gets a DIFFERENT response. Client "C" calls agency Contact "3", asks the same question, gets yet another response. Client "A" calls agency Contact "1" again to find out what's going on and is told yet a fourth different response. You get the idea...and it usually all happens within the same day. Other agencies post helpful hints on the wait etc. on their websites...they post any information they have about when referrals are coming/updates on the wait etc. We get the "It's a secret and don't tell anyone I told you..." treatment. No, wait, to be fair, that was what we got when we were waiting for Hope. This time it's all been, "Don't get your hopes up. Don't believe the rumors." And my personal favorite for which I may just go postal, "Once you have that baby in your arms all of this will be forgotten!" Ummm...right...you really do think I'm *that* stupid.

It looks like our Holy Grail I171-H is going to expire before we have our consulate appointment in Guangzhou. So here we go again! Dena, our social worker is updating our homestudy. Garry filled out another I600-A last night and wrote the check. We need certified copies of our birth certificates (again) and our marriage certificate (again). Total cost to re-do this stuff...around $700. Again, I am beyond insane. I'm not even nice anymore...if I ever was to begin with!

Our family recently came through a real test. Our lives were filled with anger, sadness, and fear. God brought us out of it with peace and light and hope. I know if I can just put this STUFF with the agency in proper perspective, He will certainly bring us through this as well. I also know that I want my baby.

Baby number one is an amazing creature. She started preschool last month with a flourish. I cried of course. Daddy had an upset stomach. Hopie ran off into her classroom without so much as a wave over her shoulder! LOL She can't wait to get there, she loves her teachers, she talks about all of the children every day...and this week the bottom has completely fallen out. On Tuesday she screamed bloody murder that she wasn't going and I barely got her there. Today was better but she tizzed out once we got there. I'll be darned if I know what's going on. I've talked to her teacher...and Garry and I have both talked to Hopie. We're at a loss right now to help our precious angel. The only thing Garry and I can think of is she went absolutely, completely insane last October too. Maybe it's cyclical for her! Let's just pray that Claire's month to go nuts is different from her sister's!

Oh! My weight! You remember I was hoping to lose 10 pounds before Hope started school. I didn't, but I was halfway there! I continue to work on it and am doing well. My clothes already look and FEEL a lot better. Still nothing drastic...I'm aiming to get to the low 130's and maintain. Garry is going great guns! He weighed himself this morning and has lost 11 pounds! Does my husband rock or what? ")

Claire's room looks like it is ready for her! (Just don't open the closet!) It gets cleaned just like the other rooms do now but I can't bear to go in there to organize clothes or toys yet...not until I know what her little face looks like.

And so that's where we are! Don't get me wrong, we have more positive up days than not...today is just a very down day. God will do what He does best and I just have to let Him do it!

Blessings y'all!

The China Dossier Proper!

(I originally started typing this on June 19th...before we received our I-171H!)

The following will be a listing of the paperwork that is included in the dossier to China. We need TWO ORIGINALS of each and every document. Once completed, copies of these documents are to be forwarded to the agency where they will be checked to see if we need to make any changes or corrections. Once those are made the documents must be notarized, certified by the county, and state certified by the Secretary Of State. It is possible to skip a step by going to an attorney whose notary seal is current and valid for the entire state of Ohio...which we plan on doing again! This takes care of the first two steps. Once that is finished, we will drive our dossier to Columbus, write them a check, and wait the 10-15 minutes it will take for them to staple a piece of paper to each one that says it's certified. We are blessed to have an attorney who is also a family friend. He graciously did ALL of our paperwork for Hope as a gift. I believe there is a fee, per document, to have them county certified...and if I remember correctly, there is a $5 per document fee to have it certified by the Secretary Of State's office...you do the math. ") As always, any of the paperwork that requires a fee will be enclosed like *this*.

1. *Home Study*---This has already been completed and approved. The agency has already notarized it, gotten the county certification, and sent it to Columbus for state certification...as well as forwarding a copy to the INS/BCIS.

2. *Marriage License*---Garry drove to Wooster to get these. They already come certified with the raised seal so they will only have to receive certification from the Secretary Of State.

3. *Birth Certificate*---Garry picked up his while he was in Wooster and since I'm a Wadsworth Lifer, he only had to go downtown to get mine. Two copies per parent, these also come certified with the raised seal and will only need Secretary Of State certification.

4. Divorce Decree---N/A

5. China Medical Statement For Adoptive Applicant---These were first filled out by our doctor, then the form changed. So I filled in the new set and returned them for his signature! A basic physical exam is required along with blood tests and a urinalysis. This was covered under our insurance for Hope and we're fairly sure it will covered for Claire as well. The form wants name, date of birth, and address. There are 11 Yes/No questions under Medical History. It is basically a list of have you ever had Tuberculosis, Tumor, Heart Disease etc. The next section consists of information gathered during the physical exam and lab work. Height (in meters), weight (in kilograms), blood pressure, vision, hearing, heart, lungs etc. There is a lisiting of all of the blood/lab tests required and they want to know the date they were completed and if they were normal/abnormal or negative/positive. You will all be thrilled to know (as were Garry and I) that we are still HIV negative. Sarcasm folks...sarcasm. They want a list of any medications we are taking and for what purpose and if our health is suitable for raising a child. Doctor's signature, date, MD license number, and SPECIAL stamp...done. We got so wound up about this "special" stamp. We thought it was something issued by the AMA or something. Nope, it seems they just have a hard time reading the doctors' handwriting so they want a stamp on the paper showing name, address, phone number etc.

6. Employment Letter---To be written on company letterhead, by the employer, and state length of time employed and salary amount. We had this done at the same time we did our home study documents. We just asked for THREE originals at once! The wonderful woman who did this for Garry even gave us a spare. THANK YOU!

7. Non-Employment Statement---I wrote this one for myself, by myself. All it says is that after adopting Hope I decided to become a full-time stay at home Mama, and plan to continue as one after bringing Claire home.

8. Local Police Clearance---Again, we simply asked for THREE originals per parent when we went to have this done for the home study.

9. China Financial Statement For Adoptive Applicant---Name, annual income this year and last year, other annual income, life insurance amounts, listing and amount of assets, listing of liabilities, their monthly payment, and totals owed...totals for everything, and signatures!

10. Tax Form---Copies of pages 1-2 of last years 1040 form.

11. Passports---Copies of the inside front cover of our passports showing our picture and signature.

12. Letter Asking To Adopt---I think this one is pretty self explanatory! If you're interested in reading our letter let me know and I'll email you a copy. There are several statements that must be included but basically you are telling the Chinese officials about yourselves, why you want to adopt, and the type/age of child you are interested in.

13. Guardianship Statements---These are actually two separate documents. We need to write a letter to the Chinese officials stating who will be responsible for our daughters' care should anything happen to us. They want to know names, ages, jobs, if there are any other children in the home, if they are in good health, etc. The people whom we have appointed as guardians, need to also write a letter stating that they accept the responsibilty and re-state all of the same information we had in our letter.

14. Copy of I-171H Notice Of Favorable Determination---Holy Grail time folks. When you begin this process you are faced with Holy Grail Part One, the I-600A. This is called the Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition. You are letting them know your intent. I can't give you many details because Garry filled it out both times. We mailed it off, along with our check to the INS/BCIS in Cleveland on April 13th. They received it on the 14th and sent us a receipt for our check. A few weeks later we received a letter telling us when to report to Cleveland to have our fingerprinting done. If you remember, we had those done on May 31st. The INS/BCIS can't complete the process without the completed home study. They received ours on June 1st. You are told to expect Holy Grail Part Two, the I-171H within 60-90 days after they receive your home study. I STILL can't believe we actually HAVE it already...just 21 days after the home study reached Cleveland! The I-171H states, "Your advance processing application has been forwarded to the American Consulate or Embassy at Guangzhou, People's Republic of China and email sent 6/22/05. Approved for one (1) child. WHOO HOO!!!!!

Tomorrow...next week...whatever it takes. Life's tragedies and miracles continue whether I post or not! ")

As promised, here is everything you've always wanted to know about The China Dossier. As with the home study documents, I can only speak to what my agency wants me to do at this point in time. Any form requiring some sort of payment will be surrounded like *this*.

1. *Agency Registration Form*---A four page document that basically tells the agency that we want to adopt from China. Page one wants the date of application, date the I-600A was filed (Holy Grail part one), date of I-171H approval (Holy Grail part two), names, birthdates, social security numbers, country of citizenship, place of birth, email address, home/work/cell phone numbers, FedEx account number, date of marriage, my maiden name, name of the agency conducting the home study along with their address, phone number, date it was initiated and then completed, and the name of our social worker. Page two needs salary and the effective date of that salary, amount in savings, amount in checking, and any investments we may have. It continues by asking the purchase price of our home, our mortgage amount, our monthly payment, date of purchase, current market value, and number of bedrooms. After that we are to provide lists of banks, personal loans, or other accounts that we owe money to. We must provide the names, balances, and monthly payments for each. Also included on this page is a spot for the name of carrier, the amounts, and the effective dates for life, disability, and health insurance. Page two ends with a section called "Child Desired". We are to check what sex we prefer to adopt, enter an age range, indicate if we are interested in a sibling group, and which country we want to adopt from. Page three! We are to list the names, ages, and relationships of any other person living in our home. We continue by listing the names, addresses, phone numbers, and dates of birth for our parents followed by the same information with our siblings. We must also include ourselves (and the same information that was entered on page one) along with our siblings to show birth order. Page three concludes with a small section where we are to describe our general health and any medications we are currently taking. The last page wants to know if we've ever applied to another child-placing agency, if we are currently trying to adopt through another agency, if we've ever been disapproved by another agency, or if we've ever had a child removed from our home. Signed...dated...done.

2. Adoptive Applicant Authorization For Release Of Confidential Information Police/Criminal Record Check---The exact same form we filled out for the home study...again for the China program.

2. Affidavit Of Health Insurance Coverage---A very simple, one page form that verifies that the adopted child will be covered under our health insurance once the adoption is final. The information needed includes family name, policy number, address, effective date, telephone number, name of insurance company, address of insurance company, and the phone number of insurance company. It requires the name of the insurance company again at the bottom, the signature of the person verifying this information, and the date. OK! Rant coming! This little ditty has to be filled out by either: the insurance company, the human resource department of the company of employment, or the insurance representative within the company. The human resource department has had this form since APRIL and has done nothing except pass the buck on who has to fill it out. It has literally been in FOUR DIFFERENT STATES and has yet to be touched. The last time Garry called to find out what was going on, the woman he spoke to gave him the impression that if he called again it was never going to be completed. Garry's boss is in Dallas. Garry is in Dallas this week. Garry is having a blank form FedExed to him, will fill it out himself, and have his boss sign it. Enough already!

4. Information Summary---Another simple one pager! Names, birthdates, ages, places of birth, date, place, and officiant of our marriage, address, schools we attended and level/year completed, work address, occupation, years there, annual income, passport numbers and expiration dates, name, gender, date of birth, date of adoption, and race of our children...and if the child lives with us.

All of these have been turned into our agency, save for the elusive health insurance document.

Those are basically the registration documents...I haven't even begun to tell you about the dossier paperwork...and won't until later! My daughter is awake!