Wednesday, January 21, 2009

ABC Wednesday---A is for...Adult Diapers! Aye Carumba!


So I've decided to give ABC Wednesday a try. To find out more about ABC Wednesday drop by Mrs. Nesbitt's Place.




No...I'm not wearing adult diapers. I'm not quite ready for those...yet. However, I'm fairly sure Claire will be wearing them if she doesn't decide to use the potty sometime soon. I think when we were going through this with Hope I had resigned myself to the fact that she would be wearing them at her prom...with Claire? Think WEDDING. I'm sure that by that time they'll have some reaaaaally cute ones...maybe even with little lace flowers...or dare I say a thong? Shoot, by that time I will be ready for them...we could get a mother/daughter set.

Yes, we're smack dab in the trenches of potty training again. And yes...I *know* that term is no longer PC. I don't care what you call it...Toilet Training, Toilet Teaching, Fecal Foundations, UD Ed. (urination/defecation education), Commode Edification, Stool Nirvana, Urination Edification, Bowl Enlightenment, P & P Workshop (you figure it out), Pee Pee Pontification, Diaper Re-Education...it matters not. The final goal, no matter how many decades it may take, is the same. Frankly I don't sit my kids down and announce, "Today we will begin Potty Training." So it's not like they're ever going to hear that term anyway.


I've read the books...I've listened to the "experts"...and the countless sweet and well intentioned comments from mothers of other two year olds who were either completely trained by the time they were 9 months old...or in utero. "We just had to SHOW her the potty and that was that!" How wonderful! Hope loved to sit on her potty too! In the middle of the family room fully clothed...it made a great tv chair.

One such expert? John Rosemond. I LOVE him. I have had the distinct pleasure of seeing this man in person. I mean...in a world devoid of common sense he is a BEACON! Well...except for that Naked and $75 bit of wisdom. Rosemond advocates stripping your toddler...at least from the waist down...and letting her run free through your home for several days. Here's the most succinct description I found online:

"Parent(s) stay at home with the child for several days and allow the child to walk around the house naked all day long. The potty is put out so it is constantly available to the child. Parents regularly remind the child to use the potty when necessary. Rosemond argues that children won't tolerate urine and feces running down their legs, and will quickly learn to go to the potty to avoid accidents. The $75 is for carpet cleaning."

Ummm...yeah...at this point I'm also thinking that A could be for Alcohol. I'm thinking Mr. Rosemond must've had an off day when he posed this one...I dunno...maybe the space heater in his office was malfunctioning or something? I remember seeing a piece on 20/20 or some such show years ago having to do with Naked and $75. At least one of the couples who tried it summed it up by saying, "It took more than $75 to clean our carpets...and our home smelled like a barn." Not really a resounding endorsement...eh?

It's not that Claire isn't aware of the whole deal...believe me...she's aware. I can sit her on the potty for ten minutes, or twenty minutes, or thirty minutes. The result is always the same. "Mama! All done!" Mama says, "Did you pee pee in the potty?" Claire answers, "No." Mama says, "Are you ever going to go pee pee in the potty?" Claire answers, "No." Soooo...Mama puts another Easy Up on her, she puts on her pants, and now her slippers...and before we get back downstairs she announces, "Mama! Wet!"

::deep, resounding, soul wrenching sigh of parental frustration::

Last week I was sitting at the computer. She came running in, put all of her weight on her left leg, raised her right hip and cheek into the air, pointed at her backside, made a pretty nasty face, and proclaimed, "Mama! Poopy!" Oh! Did I mention we'd just gotten off the potty?

Yes, I know these are all good signs. She is aware of what's happening and things WILL get better. But I also think there are probably a lot of parents out there who share, have shared, or WILL share in my frustration. The best potty training advice I EVER got was from my friend Carol. I asked her how long it took her son Nicholas to complete his Potty Training. All she said was, "It takes a really long time."

I was talking about it with Garry this morning and both of us were dying laughing. He said he sat her on the potty before bath last night and she was, and I quote, "working really hard." He said she sucked her stomach in as far as it would go and then made these little grunting noises. Then she made this little face and threw up her arms, again, quoting, "as if to say, 'I got nothin!'"

Such is the life when you Adopt two Angels from Across the globe.

Aye Carumba...Alleluia...Amen!


12 comments:

Lene said...

I`m shure Claire will try the potty soon. When my son stopet using diapers 20 years ago, he had an accident only once - and he told me: Maaaam, the kitten has pied in my bed ;))

Claire is A for Absolutly adorable :)

D Herrod said...

Good luck

Carolina said...

Love your post. Adult Diapers indeed! I love the idea of a flowery thong thingy. A well known childrens' entertainer in the Netherlands used to yell: Yoopy the Poopy (or actually Joepie de Poepie). Seems to be a very fitting yell if the happy day finally arrives ;-) Good luck!

pictureeachday said...

This is a hilarious 'A' post! Thank you for the laughs, and best of luck with training :)

Mel said...

Lene...we have two cats as well...I hope Claire doesn't get the same idea as your son had! ")

D...thank you very much...I'll take all the luck that is offered!

Carolina...your comments had me in stitches! Here's praying that I'll be able to use Joepie de Poepie for my "J" post...I don't want to have to wait all the way until Yoopy the Poopy!

pictureeachday...so glad I could make you smile! Come back anytime!

Suldog said...

Mel:

Thank you for the extremely kind words over at my place. They were much appreciated.

I know a good trick with boys is to give them a target. That is, place something in the toilet - just a piece of paper or whatever - and have them try to "shoot" it down. It becomes associated with fun to go to the toilet. I don't expect that will work quite as well with a girl, though. Sorry!

Carolina said...

I will keep my fingers crossed for you to be able to yell Joepie de Poepie! Let me know and I will yell with you! Curious about the photo you will enter with that one ;-)
Thanks for your comment on my bowl. I actually made about twenty photos and this one was the only acceptable one. Turned out quite nice fortunately. Already thinking about the B-entry. Not to mention the C, D and the rest ;-)

Mel said...

Suldog...if this keeps up much longer I just MAY give the target trick a try! ;)

Carolina...STOP!!! The thought of the picture I would post for "J" has me doubled over!!!!

Tumblewords: said...

Clever A. Good luck!

Cheri and Shane said...

Just stopping by to wish you a Happy Chinese New Year!! I am so behind on reading blogs, but I just read this entry and I have to be honest...I am NOT looking forward to the potty training at all. I always ask Hope "Wanna sit on the potty"...just to introduce it to her so she's not scared...sometimes she'll sit, and at other times she says "Ugghhh" (that's her "NO") and turns her head.

I hope things are going better for Claire since you last posted this! :)

Hugs,
Cheri

Life with Kaishon said...

I am dying for a baby, but when I remember the potty training, it holds me back...It took us forever too. Good luck. I kind of like that idea of letting them run around naked until they get it. If I had no carpets that would be perfect.

Adult Diapers said...

Another informative blog… Thank you for sharing it… Best of luck for further endeavor too.

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